Wishing All A Blessed and Happy New Year

Posted by on Jan 1, 2014 in Blog

Wishing All A Blessed and Happy New Year

photo-37Happy New Year and best wishes for much hope, happiness and peace in 2014! It is hard to believe another year has gone by. This last year has been a BIG year for me. I feel I have healed tremendously, evident by the fact I joyously made it through the holiday season and mostly remained in great spirits without the usual break down from missing Brooke. I felt her presence as always and of course I proudly decorated the house for the holidays with many things that reminded me of her. The Christmas tree was filled with ornaments the kids made over the years and the house was lit up brightly both inside and out —complete with a lighted angel proudly on display in Brooke’s window shining down in loving memory.

It makes me feel good to know Brooke still touches others. Some of the stories are beyond amazing! I was touched by a text of pictures I received the week before Christmas of photos of Brooke’s soccer coach and her soccer team together this year at their Christmas celebration. There was a huge orb in each photo, which the team of course knew was Brooke joining them! For us “the unbelievable” has become “the usual” and we are never surprised by the constant proof from multiple sources that Brooke’s energy is present. I find her “signs” the source of great peace. Paige on the other hand sometimes is a little spooked by all that happens. I continually reassure her Brooke’s energy is nothing to be afraid of but I imagine it is a lot for a ten year old to process.

I continue to learn and grow as a parent, entering unchartered waters with both Blake (who shockingly turns 19 next week) and Paige. I want so bad to do everything right with them that in turn I often drive them crazy. I struggle to let go of my fears that something could happen to one of them. Accepting my son is now technically an adult and able to legally make huge decisions on his own has been tough for me. Blake bought a motorcycle against my wishes and we have had some rocky months as a result. I know he wants to spread his wings but this is just to disturbing to me. He has agreed to sell it, but until it is gone, I still lose sleep. Parenting is the toughest job ever! I try to do my best. I am proud of them both and try to make sure they understand they are the love of my life.

I am excited about 2014 and the possibilities ahead after all the change in my life in 2013. I did something we are so often terrified to do—I courageously let my heart guide me and took huge steps in new directions. I have a wonderful man in my life and opening up to him has brought me a ton of peace and happiness this last year. Although he wasn’t a part of my life when Brooke passed, I almost feel like he was with how well he has gotten to know me. He is very sensitive and understanding. He has taken the time to get to know Brooke and my feelings. He has grown accustomed to Brooke’s presence and has witnessed her energy on many of occasions! To him, it is now just a normal everyday thing. He has been a tremendous support to me and I feel blessed to have him in my life. Falling in love sure has been fun!

In addition, in the end of November after much thought and consideration I returned to Corporate America and started a new position with a new company in an entirely different industry. The company was an obvious choice based on my interactions with multiple different people in the organization. Never before have I met such caring people. They have all been incredibly supportive and understanding of what I have been through. I was shocked when several of the senior executives even took the time to read my book. I feel as though I found a new home and a new family with this group and I am encouraged about what lies ahead. After having worked 20 years at the same organization starting over with a new company in a new industry where I know literally nothing is a major move outside of my comfort zone. Scary but at the same time exciting! I am confident I will become a better more rounded person from it. If you listen close enough somehow you know what is right and can feel the direction you are supposed to go regardless of how scary it seems.

Despite all I have been through I am incredible happy. Life is full of challenges, but you can survive them and still find happiness. I look forward to a year of love and peace with family and friends and wish the same for all! May you have a wonderful 2014—Happy New Year!

Many blessings,

Jennifer

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